gibbon-arsed ramblings of a hopeless underachiever

Thursday, May 29, 2003


so, what's happened since I posted last? Well:

interview with housing co-op, didn't go so well Big Brother started ohmygod get rid of Sissy the girl's voice kills me, had to get extension on dissertation deadline erk UK lost the Eurovision, bloody right an' all they couldn't carry a tune in a bucket, Blair goes to Iraq to do yet more PR for the US, what the hell does Bush have over him and are we actually going to try and find Saddam now or just run away and leave them to rot like we did in Afghanistan?

sorry. goodnight. More when I'm a little further away from a nervous breakdown

posted by bandhag | 5/29/2003 11:16:00 PM

Tuesday, May 20, 2003


oh - that's "The Periodic Table" as in the novel by Primo Levi. Not the periodic table, a big chart about chemicals. Even I'm not that sad. Honest.

posted by bandhag | 5/20/2003 09:04:00 PM


Yeah, ok, I'm skiving. Skiving and copying. So sue me.

last cigarette: last ever? When this dissertation's finished, hopefully. Maybe.
last car ride: I can't actually remember... I guess it would have been a taxi home at some point. Maybe a couple of weeks ago?
last movie seen: At the cinema - Cabaret. I watched Girl, Interrupted on the telly the other day. It were reet good.
last book read: The Periodic Table. A Christmas present from somone special.
last beverage drank: I am drinking delicious diet lemonade as we speak. Smashing. And so much better than buze, oh yes. Pffft.
last food consumed: a handful of Reese's Pieces. Before that - some fruit for breakfast. Balanced meals, that's what we like.
last phone call: to my best friends last night, because the cat brought in a live mouse and immediately chased it behind the desk (rather than playing with it for my "entertainment" in the middle of the room like she normally does). I decided I probably wasn't going to get much work (or sleep) done, so I phoned them and nattered until I could figure out a way to trap the little bugger and release it back into the wild. This took approximately two hours.
last tv show watched: Smallville. Geeeeeek.
last time showered: This morning.
last shoes worn: my red Converse. They need dirtying.
last sleep: Last night. I could do with a week of it.
last im: uh? Does this mean instant message? I don't have that, anyway.
last time amused: When I read this.
last show attended: "proper" gig - the Datsuns. They were good. Their guitarist needs to have sex with me. A lot.
last webpage visited: Kitchentable, from whom I nicked this, which he nicked from Rhoda.

And back to work.

posted by bandhag | 5/20/2003 08:46:00 PM

Saturday, May 17, 2003


Blaaargh! I am going to be out of action for the next fortnight, trying to write 20,000 words of project. Shit. No doubt I may falter and pop in to moan, but I'm going to try not to.

While I'm gone, why not amuse yourself with just how lazy the police force are I can see it now "Stop, thief!" "Don't worry, ma'am - as long as he maintains an average speed and I can get up to that in 0 seconds, I'll have in no time" [shouts from considerable distance behind sprinting rapscallion] "You're NICKED, son. Oi, slow down, I said you're NICKED."

posted by bandhag | 5/17/2003 08:47:00 AM

Saturday, May 10, 2003


I am in a world of work. Plus depression, which is nice.

Had a real blast from the past today - I saw Mr and Mrs Surly. Mr and Mrs Surly is a name I came up with for a couple who were on the same course as me at Uni when I was doing my first degree. I used to see them around all the time - in town as well as in classes and saw them around quite a bit after that as well, but not for a couple of years. They are never seen apart. They are also never seen a) smiling or b) talking. Not to each other, and not to other people. They would sit in seminars of only 6 or 7 people, and stay absolutely silent the entire time. Both their faces seem permanently set on 'scowl'. When I saw them today, I ended up walking behind them for a good 10 minutes or so, and around the same shop (I was going that way anyway, not stalking them, don't worry) for another 20 or so and they did not say a word to each other in all that time. There weren't any "We are having a row" type vibes about them, they just didn't talk. Or smile. Picked things up, looked at them, obviously liked them because they kept hold of them to buy, but no flicker of emotion or communication.

Now I'm one of those people who's forever being asked what's wrong or told to "Cheer up, love, it might never happen" even when I'm perfectly happy - some of us just have faces that, when relaxed, don't look very cheery, perhaps. And I know that when you've been in a relationship with someone for a long time, you're often very comfortable with not talking for long stretches of time. But these guys - they're in another league. I can't help but try to figure them out, every time I see them. I wonder if they're happy together. I wonder what, if anything, makes them happy - what it is they enjoy about their life of silence together; or whether they close the doors and instantly fall about laughing, and chatter like monkeys until the small hours. Perhaps they just hate the outside world so much they're only happy when it's just the two of them and everything else is shut outside.

posted by bandhag | 5/10/2003 07:04:00 PM

Tuesday, May 06, 2003


So, as I explained to a friend of mine last night, at about 4 o'clock this morning it sounded like there were six people having a "build some IKEA furniture with a mallet, while doing a clog dance" party in the upstairs flat. It also sounds like they've knocked down all the internal walls and ripped up every bit of carpet in the entire flat. What do you do about noisy neighbours? More to the point, what do you do about them when you live on your own and are a bit scared of them getting unpleasant with you? Perhaps I'll be really brave and put a note through the door when I leave. That'll show em, eh?..

posted by bandhag | 5/06/2003 07:10:00 AM
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